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Updated: 06/16/03

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Monday, 16 June, 2003

If PETA thinks that Cow Bingo is emotionally damaging, am sure they'll be outraged by this:

School Leader Wins Cow-Kissing Contest

MORGANTOWN, W.Va. - A youth church group cashed in on a cow kissing contest.

The group assigned milk jugs to several members of the community. Church members placed money in jugs of the people they most wanted to kiss a bovine, and the man and woman with the most money in their jugs won.

Monongalia County Schools Assistant Superintendent Jake Mullett and resident Beverly Shumaker took the honors and puckered up Friday to smooch Sissy, a 3-year-old Hereford cow.

Think of the emotional scars on this poor cow!! Thrown into a world of forced affection at the tender age of three! And the cruel irony of using MILK JUGS to collect the money!

[The horror. The HORROR.]

Well, since I'm updating stories . . . a while back I wrote about the infamous Hatfield and McCoy Feud, and the fact that it's now been moved from the hills of Kentucky and West Virginia into the courtroom. I guess that the lawsuit is still trickling through the court system, but the remaining descendants of the two warring tribes have now signed a truce.

PIKEVILLE, Ky. - A pen and ink sealed the end of Appalachia's most infamous bloody feud instead of a shotgun and bullets.

Descendants of the Hatfield and McCoy families gathered Saturday in Pikeville to sign the truce, making a largely symbolic and official end to a feud that had claimed at least a dozen lives from the two mountain families.

"We ask by God's grace and love that we be forever remembered as those that bound together the hearts of two families to form a family of freedom in America," says the truce, signed by more than 60 descendants.

Kentucky Gov. Paul Patton and West Virginia Gov. Bob Wise also signed proclamations declaring June 14 Hatfield and McCoy Reconciliation Day.

Ron McCoy, a founder of Hatfield-McCoy Festival, now in its fourth year, said the families haven't decided what to do with the signed proclamations.

[I think they should fight for 'em.]

~ ~ ~

Quote du jour:

"He who lives by fighting with an enemy has an interest in the preservation of the enemy's life."

-- Friedrich Nietzsche (1844 - 1900) German philosopher, poet

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