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Updated: 04/01/04

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What's on the nightstand

by H. Rider Haggard



Thursday, 01 April, 2004

Well, Mom and Dad - and Ron and Jim - are off to Africa! Yea! Mom sent an e-mail this morning asking if I could make hotel reservations for them for their return to Atlanta that were just a little bit closer to the airport. So they'll be at the Sheraton which is only half a mile away, rather than the 15 miles that they had to schlep last night.

But of course that's two weeks from now, after they've finished their safari.

[Gee, I feel that my eyes have gone a little GREEN.]

But I won't be TOOOOOOO jealous, since we're leaving for Turks and Caicos in 8 days!

[8 days, 13 hours and 17 minutes - but not that I'm counting.]

From the Stupid Lawsuit du Jour file, here's a winner:

Man Sues US Airways After He Drank Alcohol, Fell Down Escalator

BONITA SPRINGS, Fla. (AP) - A West Virginia man who fell down an escalator at an airport sued US Airways, alleging the airline didn't warn him about the adverse affects of drinking alcohol on a plane.

Floyd W. Shuler, 61, filed the lawsuit against Virginia-based US Airways Inc., in circuit court in Fort Myers.

Shuler, who has lived part-time on Marco Island, said in the suit that US Airways was negligent by failing to warn him the effects of alcohol are greater at night on airline passengers. The suit, filed Friday, also alleges that the company did not properly maintain the escalator at Southwest Florida International Airport when he fell down it on Aug. 28, 1999.

The suit seeks damages in excess of $15,000.

The really sad things about suits like this is that these idiots cannot be forced to do some sort of community service work to make up for the time and money that they've WASTED.

[Or just clubbed with a big "Grow Up" stick.]

And in the never-ending parade of responsibility-free parenting:

The quality of toddlers' diets is "horrifying" with junk food prevalent, a survey of parents has shown.

Nine out of 10 toddlers are allowed to eat junk food.

The survey of 2,000 parents by Mother and Baby magazine and Cow & Gate found children's favourite foods include chocolate and crisps. Eight out of 10 parents admitted their children had worse diets than they had at that age.

[Here's the money quote:]

But few thought they were to blame.

R-i-i-i-i-g-h-t. It's what, the Bad Nutrition Fairies that swoop into your homes with their bags of Mickey D's and Hostess Sno-Balls ready to cram that junk food into poor little Victim, Jr's mouth? I mean, HOW ELSE do the tykes get their mitts on the junk food if it doesn't come from the parents?

[Coming soon: More Obesity Lawsuits!]

Quote du jour:

"Make voyages. Attempt them. There's nothing else."

-- Tennessee Williams (1911-1983) U.S. Playwright

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