Spoke too soon. Well, the weekend was lovely though. Gary's mom was already down at our place in Longport when we arrived Saturday morning, although with her busy social schedule, we only managed to see her for dinner on Sunday night.
On Saturday night the "Owner's Party" was being held near the pool, THE annual event for the condo complex. The last two years we have attended the Fourth of July BBQ at the other complex where we were renting and it was always a nice time. Only $15 per person for burgers and BBQ chicken on the grill, BYOB, and a chance to get to know some of the other residents. So when we realized that we would be down in time for the party this year, we asked Gary's mom if she wanted to come but she said no, it was really expensive and she had other plans. So I went to see George the manager to see if the two of us could still sign up. He said no problem, there was no charge for two people per unit, and $50 per person after that. I asked if it was a BYOB and he said no, there would be two full bars there.
We went down, expecting the usual grilled meaty things and corn on the cob. Oh my, were we wrong. First, they had butlered hors d'oeuvres: mini crab cakes, seared ahi tuna on toast points, vidalia onion tarts, dried apricots topped with blue cheese and walnuts, grilled lamb "Lollipops" and bruschetta. They were all delicious. We noshed and talked with several of the other owners, many of whom we knew either by coming down in the off season or through Gary's mom.
The buffet dinner was a little slow in getting on the tables, but well worth the wait: grilled filet of beef, chicken, bow tie pasta, grilled sea bass, grilled veggies, salads, and an antipasta platter. And then there was the seafood bar with raw clams and oysters, jumbo lump crab meat, chilled shrimp and mini lobster tails. Unbelievable! Or course the desserts went on and on and eventually we waddled back upstairs. What a terrific party!
So all in all, a great weekend. Sunshine, a chance to ride the bikes and some time on the beach. Gary's son Josh turned 21 on July 3rd, so we headed back into town on Monday afternoon. It turned out fine, since Gary was on call Tuesday the 4th anyway.
Tuesday morning we got up and I drove him to the hospital. I went to the grocery store and did some shopping, planning to head over around 1:00 p.m. I had everything bagged up and ready to go, my clothes for work on Wednesday folded up. I put my cell phone on top of them and started downstairs when I realized that the front windows on the plant shelf were open. I set my clothes and phone down on the gallery railing and went to close the windows. Suki was lurking, waiting to dash out with me so when I went through the little door onto the ledge, I pulled it closed so she couldn't follow.
As soon as I heard it I knew what it meant. I was locked out on the plant shelf, twelve feet above the stone floor of the den. Luckily, I could just take a screen out and get onto the master bedroom deck.
Unluckily, the bedroom doors and windows were shut and locked and there are no keys on the deck. Let's assess, shall we?
- Door into bedroom is shut and locked.
- Cell phone is across the room on the railing.
- Gary is at the hospital, expecting me to arrive soon, but even if he calls, I can't answer the phone.
- I have the car so if he decides to come looking for me - however many hours from now - he'll have to catch a cab.
- There is a lamp and my laptop in the way of a soft landing on the sofa, not to mention my absolute fear of heights.
- The other option is an even longer jump into a muddy pit in the front yard.
So here's what I did, not necessarily in this order:
- Contemplated stone floor and large gap between me and it.
- Kicked door.
- Yelled more.
- Contemplated breaking window into master bedroom.
- Decided against that.
- Contemplated stone floor and large gap between me and it, again.
- Took apart deck umbrella and tried to tie fabric onto shelf to lower self to floor.
- Realized stupidity of above.
- Cried more.
Finally, I just started ramming the wooden door with my body.
See Kay ram.
Ram, ram, ram.
Ahhh, those splintering sounds were music to my ears. I managed to break the door frame enough to slip through into the bedroom. As Gary said later, upon viewing the damage, "Remind me not to mess with you!"
The moral of the story? Don't lock self onto plant shelf when no one else is home and the cell phone is across the room. Or, more to the point . . . well, you probably figured it out. Good news is that I managed to get to the hospital eventually.
[And without any broken limbs.]
I am long remiss in showing you what Aunt Bernie sent us after the Uber Moms' visit last year. Actually, I've only just found the right hangers for them, so it's not that long since they've been hung. She sent us two beautiful obis, one black and one gold. We have them hanging in the main stairwell area: